Part One

"Not for me..." Sonny's voice rang in her head. Her heart skipped a beat with Sonny's utterance of these three words. But ofcourse, she was a fool to believe. A fool to hope and wish. Sonny was her friend and she was his, but his intentions are clearer to her now. Sonny values their friendship but foremost, her legal expertise. As much as she denies it, she was hurt and jelous. As Sonny's friend, it's instinctual that she should be happy for him, that he is happy and is with the woman he loves. But in her mind, she always wondered "What if..." What if Carly hadn't seen her and Sonny in bed together. What if her 'presumed death' didn't occur. Where would she be now? Would she and Sonny be together? Would Carly be with Zander? Would Carly be out of Sonny's life and Alexis in it instead? No. Carly would always be part of Sonny's life. Michael is their eternal bond. Sonny would never abandon a child like Mike did him. That's what she loved about him. He has a big heart and would never abandon his family. She lauhed to herself, "A mobster with a heart of gold. You sure know how to pick 'em Alexis." The thought of a family and a child reminded her of their child. Deep down she knew Sonny should know. Sonny should be part of their child's life. But his business was too dangerous. For the safety of their baby and hers, they need to stay away from him. She reminded herself that it's for the best. Knowing about the unborn child could bring back old memories --- bad memories. She hated withholding the truth from Sonny. But she didn't want to keep his hopes up. She didn't want to add to his list of miscarried children. Dr. Meadows and Dr. Bonds has informed her morethan once that she's taking a risk with her pregnancy. A woman of her age was more susceptible to pregnancy fatalities and the last thing she wants to do is break the heart of the man she loves. The man she loves. She's never spoken the words, well once, blurted it out to Kristina, but never again after that. But she felt it. Her heart ached for Sonny. She was a woman of many talents, a strong, independent, principled and top-notch attorney, but when it came to the matters of the heart, she was vulnerable and weak. Her heart was her Achilles heel. Tears freely flowed out of her eyes. She tried to stop the flow of emotions but it's heaviness has been tolled. His winning smile and killer dimples made her go weak in the knees... his eyes and that look he gives her when... Stop! She tried to push Sonny's face out of her mind and shuffled through the legal papers on her desk. A knock on the door made her jump out of her seat, sending the glass of water on the floor.

The sound of shattering glass inside Alexis' apartment made him nervous. He pushed his ears closer to the door trying to figure out what she was up to. "Alexis, it's Sonny. What's going on in there? Are you alright?"

The sound of his voice startled her. Think fast Alexis, say something.

The lack of response made him uneasy. "Alexis..."

She swollowed the lump in her throat and aswered, "Yeah, I... I'm ok. Do you need something?" she called out from the other side of the door.

Her muffled voice concerned him, "Can I come in?"

"Um, I'm kind of busy right now. I'm swamped with legal documents for a client."

"It won't take long."

Alexis reluctantly turned the knob and opened the door. She stood there, face to face with the father of her child.